#59: Don’t Bogart That Watermelon

Breaking July 4th warning: Eating watermelon, says a new study, can have the same effect as popping Viagra. Yes, ladies and gents, the aging males at your holiday picnic may discover a new fondness for the large pink fruit. The secret ingredient is something called citrulline, according to news reports, and eating a lot of it can make Gramps feel as sprightly as a 14-year-old boy.

Better stock up on extra watermelons for your 4th of July barbeque. Watch yourself around anyone who has a suspicious number of rinds on his plate. And be on the lookout for opportunities to say: Is that a watermelon in your pants, or have you just been overeating?

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